Blessings

Today we are blessing our sweet baby boy. Some family has come into town and we have them and dear friends to share this day with us. Because of this event I've been thinking a lot about how we've been blessed over the last couple years.

We've had our trials but in a way I'm grateful for them. I know that Heavenly Father loves me and that he wants to bless me. Sometimes life doesn't work out the way we want but through these trials I have learned so much.

I've learned to rely on the Lord. I've learned that I can pray and actually communicate with my Heavenly Father instead of it just being a one way phone line. I've learned that He knows me individually. He knows my needs and wants and he knows that I'm stronger than I think I
am. I have prayed many a time--especially while I was pregnant--to help me to feel better, to take the pail away (be it emotional or physical). But if that couldn't happen then that I would have the strength to endure; that I would be able to make it the the day. And you know what? I did. I'm still here. The pain didn't go away but I believed that HF either knew I could handle it or he gave me the ability to handle it.

I've learned that life doesn't always work out the way you want but when it does life can be beautiful. The challenges don't go away completely when you finally get what you want--who am I kidding? I'll have more challenges for many years to come now that I have another kid--but I think I have a renewed sense of diligence and determination to do what I know I'm supposed to.

Our son has brought so much joy to our family. It's weird to think he's been alive for almost 7 weeks now but at the same time it's like we've always had him. I have so much to be thankful for on this day. Buckethead will be getting a blessing from his father but I am the one who has truly been blessed.

Poor Guy

So this morning I nursed Buckethead and layed him down for a nap in this glider chair we have in our room. In the living room I turned on the monitor and went about doing whatever it was I was doing. Oh yeah listening to this. A few minutes later--maybe 10--Boogers says, "That sounds like Buckethead." I look at the monitor and no lights where flashing so I didn't think anything of it. She likes to pretend he's not sleeping so I didn't go and check on him either. After the Declaration was over T-Bone got up and walked down the hall. That was when he heard BH crying and went in to get him.

He found him covered in spit-up-and I mean soaked. He must have puked up everything he's eaten so far this morning. Poor guy! We felt so bad! Of course he picked him up and we got him out of his clothes and gave him a bath. I layed him on the floor and put lotion on his tummy, legs and arms and then turned him over so I could put lotion on his back. He was in the middle of his nap so he was pretty relaxed but I guess that put him over the edge. I was about to roll him back over to put his diaper on but he just looked too comfortable. He fell fast alseep wrapped up in a towel. I'm sure he'll wake up to a wet spot on the floor but I just can't bring myself to move him.

(Turns out Boogers had changed the channel on the monitor so it wasn't picking anything up. That's why we never heard him.)

Happy 4th of July!

When in the Course of human events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another, and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.

We, therefore, the Representatives of the united States of America, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme Judge of the world for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good People of these Colonies, solemnly publish and declare, That these united Colonies are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent States; that they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the British Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of Great Britain, is and ought to be totally dissolved.

And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes and our sacred Honor.

This morning I listened to the Declaration of Independence read by NPR. (Thanks Shelley for the link!) I have such a love for this great land that we live in. I'm one of those that cries when I sing or hear the Star Spangled Banner. It's amazing to think what these men did 233 years ago. I have read the Declaration before but today I was especially amazed at how gutsy they were. They knew that the things they said against the King of England were going to get them killed yet they knew that what they were doing was right.

In the past I've posted something from Rush Limbaugh called "Our Lives, Our Fortunes, Our Sacred Honor" that lists what happened to these men. They truly were men of honor.

I love my country and hope you all have a great 4th of July!

The iPhone really can do everything

I totally forgot to put in Sean's birth story one of the best parts...how he got his name. T-Bone and I had talked of many names like all expecting parents do. We had our preliminary list that we narrowed down to a few. We knew we wanted either Spencer or James as a middle name though so that was the easy part. When we went to the hospital our front runners for names were Adam and Ryan and a few others. After he was born everyone asked what his name was but we couldn't decide. T-Bone went home that first night to be with Boogers and I hoped when he came back the next day that both of us would have decided on our own what his name would be and it would be the same one.

Well the next day came and T-Bone came back to the hospital. He was no closer to deciding on a name than I was. We practiced calling the baby the names on our list. The one we like best was Adam and I even told a few people that's what his name was most likely going to be. But it wasn't right. Neither T-Bone or I were totally sold on it. So T-Bone decided he was just going to open up his contacts on his iPhone and start reading names. He read a few and they weren't right. Nothing was fitting this new little person in our family.

Then he said Sean.

I looked at my baby and it fit better that anything we had. I said to T-Bone "Hmm I like Sean." He did too. He kept reading names and once again nothing felt right...until he came to another Sean. It was like a weight was lifted every time I called him Sean. All the other names felt weird but when we said Sean it just felt good. The strange thing was Sean was never on any of our lists. We both looked at each other and said "Yep, that's his name." I preferred the Gaelic spelling so that's what it is. So there you have it. The iPhone really can do everything...including naming your day old son.

Booger's "Testimony" and other gems

The other day Boogers gave me a pad of paper and told me to write down what she said. These are her words:
I love Daddy.I love you.Thank you for this day.I love to say prayers.I love my heart and I love to go outside and play when it's sunny.I love my new baby brother.I love my mom and my dad and my toys.I love our car.I love Heavenly Father and Jesus.I love my games.I love having picnics at the beach and the pool and the park.
In the name of Jesus Christ, amen.
----------
And here are some more gems:
T-Bone asked for a high 5 from her.
B: Dad, I don't give high 5's to no people doing the dishes. You have to be patient. You have to be patient for cups. You have to be patient for people to come. You have to be patient for fish. I get the cups and the people, but fish??----------Mom: Boogers, when your brother comes, things are going to be different.Boogers: How Mom?M: Well I will have to take care of two people instead of just you.B: looks down, kind of sadM: What's the matter?
B: I feel grumpy.M: But I will still love you very much.B: I still feel grumpy.At least she's honest. For the record she hasn't been too grumpy since Buckethead has come. She loves her brother very much.----------B: Dad, you broke mommy's feelings.----------After I had Buckethead-B: Hey Mom, you're laying on the floor on your back! Good job!It's always nice to have someone rooting for you----------B: We should buy a Wii.M: Wii's cost a lot of money that we don't have right now.B: I have money. (Goes to get her piggy bank). I have $101 monies. (Counts all the coins in her bank up to 100) See, now we can buy a Wii!If only it was that easy...

Welcome Sean James!!

So it's been a little hard to get on the computer this week as you can probably imagine, but I'm here. Let's see if I can finish this in one go. For those of you that are interested, here is the birth story of my son, Sean James.

**Oh and for the record, this is the only time he will be referred to as Sean. He will hereafter be identified as Buckethead.**

I was due May 22nd. All through this pregnancy I have been in pain. Pain in my hips, pelvis, you name it. Plus all the puking. So when I went in for my appointment on May 20th I was hoping I could get my midwife to agree to induce me the next day or Friday. Well that was not going to happen due to Kaiser's very strict protocol. The earliest she could schedule me was Monday morning--Memorial Day. So I gladly took the spot. She told me to call the hospital at 6am on Monday just to make sure they still had a bed available.

I talked to a friend who also had Kaiser and was induced and she said, "I didn't call. I just went right in. I would rather wait there, then at home." So that's what I decided to do. The morning of May 25th arrived and I was up at about 4:30am with anticipation. I finally got out of bed a little before 6 o'clock and took a shower. T-Bone got up a little later and was getting ready too. I had hoped to leave around 6:45am but at 6:40 he was shaving. I was really excited and just tried to breathe. I thought to myself I was going to have that baby today and if we got to the hospital a little later than planned it wouldn't be a big deal. Just then my phone rang.

It was the hospital. The lady said that she had me scheduled for an induction and could we be there between 7:30 and 8:00? I said yes and immediately calmed down. Let me tell you that was an answer to a prayer. I knew they were expecting us.

After T-Bone was ready to go I asked him for a blessing. I needed a little extra peace and comfort for the day ahead of me. I was going to have a baby! We had waited so long for this day to come. The blessing was so helpful and off we went. Boogers had spent the night at my Dad's so she was taken care of for the day.

We got to the hospital at 7:30 and they hooked up my IV and did a bunch of paper work. Kaiser hadn't faxed over my file like they said they had so it took a little bit of time to get all the information they needed on me. When I got to the hospital I was dilated to 4cm. Around 9:40 the nurse started the pitocin. My nurse was Bepeen and she was the greatest lady. It was so awesome to have her there with me. She has worked the maternity floor for 18 years so I knew I was in good hands.

Bepeen started the pitocin at level 1 and then came and pushed it up one notch at a time about every half hour. All morning we just hung out in the room and watched TV. T-Bone and I were getting pretty bored and I was starting to wonder if anything was ever going to happen. I decided around noon to turn off the TV and try to rest a little. At about 12:30 the contractions finally started to get regular. They were coming every five minutes and pretty strong. They were still manageable though. I didn't really have to breathe through them at all.

About 1:00pm I felt a really strong pop--and actually heard it. Bepeen thought my water broke, but when she looked there was no indication that that's what it was. I thought maybe Buckethead had gotten his hands stuck somewhere and moved or something. As soon as Bepeen left the room I had a strong contraction that proved it was my water that broke. We called Bepeen back in and she checked me but I was still only 5cm dilated. Right after my water broke the contractions came really strong. I was yelling and moaning through them and knew I would need an epidural to get me through. I never made it to the yelling and moaning stage with Boogers so this was really new to me. I was probably quite a sight to see. It took about half and hour before the anesthesiologist came and with each contraction they were getting stronger. All through the epidural Bepeen kept asking me if I felt like I needed to push. It's funny to say this but I wasn't really sure. I could feel him moving lower and felt a lot of pressure, but I didn't know if I needed to push or not. Looking back I should have said yes. Right after they put the epidural in Bepeen checked me and I was at 9 1/2cm. The Doctor on call was called and I was ready to push. At this point I was finally able to relax and the reality of the experience really hit me. I was going to have a baby. I wasn't just in the hospital hooked up to beeping monitors. After almost three years I was going to have a baby. The hugeness of this overwhelmed me and I actually started crying.

Too bad the epidural went into effect right about then because it slowed my contractions down and I couldn't feel anything to push. At least with Boogers I could feel when I was pushing but didn't feel any pain. The nurse and Doctor said I was doing fine though and I pushed for about a half an hour or 40 minutes. I sort of wished I had been able to hold out a few more minutes before I got the epidural because I think I would have been able to push him out in just a few pushes, but oh well.

Sean James J. was born at 2:22pm on May 25, 2009, weighing 8lbs 11oz and 20 1/2 inches long. His APGARS were 8 and 9 so that was great. They put him on my stomach right away while the Doctor stitched me up and they were cleaning things. He was just so beautiful looking at me. He was pretty blue but as he cried more, he got more color. His cries were kind of weak but the nurse was cleaning him out pretty good and they got stronger and stronger. He had a lot of mucus that he was choking on and spitting up. I was surprised at how long they left him there with me. The nurse asked me if I wanted to keep holding him or have him take his bath and I just held him. I wasn't ready to let him go. With Boogers they whisked her away and weighed and cleaned her pretty soon after she was born.

It was such a surreal experience. I still look at his face and shake my head. It just doesn't feel real.

After they got him cleaned up and weighed they gave him back and everyone pretty much left us alone for a while. I tried to nurse him, but he was not interested at all. A little while later, my Dad showed up with Boogers. She was a little weirded out by him and hid under the table at first when we asked her to take a picture, but it didn't take too long for her to warm up to him and ask to hold him. She is such a proud big sister. She keeps telling everyone that comes over, "I have a new baby brother. I'm a big sister." My mom showed up a short while later and then T-Bones parents as well.

T-Bone's mom on the left with Buckethead and my mom (and dad in the background) on the right

Later they moved me to recovery and my mom took off but the others stayed. We visited for a while and then my Dad took Boogers home to his house again till T-Bone was ready to leave. Around 6:30 everyone took off and it was just me and Sean for the rest of the night.

Sean kept spurting up mucus and I had to use the booger sucker to get it out of his mouth for the next few hours. Around 10:30pm or so he spit up a bunch of brown mucus. The nurse thought he was probably done but they were just going to keep a little watch on him. Around midnight I was finally able to get him to latch on to nurse, but right after he was done he spit up again and this time it had some blood in it. Obviously that's not good so they took him and suctioned 4cc of fluid from his tummy. He was fine after that, thank heavens.

They also did the hearing screening on him three times that night and he kept failing on his left ear. All the hearing screeners thought he probably had fluid in his ear and that's why he wasn't passing. They tried one more time on Tuesday morning but he still didn't pass. So we just have to go to the audiologist in a week or so so they can do another screen. Most likely if it was a fluid problem, it will be dried up and he will pass fine.

We were discharged about 4pm on Tuesday and he's been doing great since we got home. He is such a blessing to have and I am still in awe that this is actually real. We have been so richly blessed by him in our home just for the last few days. He truly is a miracle.

We took him to his first Doctor's appointment yesterday and he weighs 8lbs 9oz. Yeah, my babies don't lose very much weight. Boogers was the same way.

In his going home outfit

For my Vegas buddies here he is dancing with Flat Liberace



Modeling my sister-in-law's sweater she made for him


Oh and did I mention he looks exactly like his sister? Can you tell which is which?

Farewell Red Fish

Well today we say goodbye to a member of our family. Red Fish has gone the way of the earth. He has given up the ghost. He has gone to that great fish bowl in the sky.

He's been a good fish. We got him back in February 2008 and figured he'd live for a few months and then we'd get a new one. But he kept on living. During the summer last year we started hearing weird clicking noises coming from his bowl. After much detective work we figured out he was digging in the rocks that we had put in his bowl.

Then earlier this year he started to get this weird film on the top of his water. It wasn't dust from our house or food--just a weird white film. We thought that he wouldn't live past February, then past March. He was starting to look sick and slow, but he kept on swimming.

Unfortunately this morning when I went to tap his bowl to make sure he was still alive, he didn't move. It's a sad day in our house. I had to teach Boogers about the life cycle and how Red Fish's spirit went up to live with Heavenly Father. She was pretty sad, but felt better when I told her we could get another fish tomorrow. She wants a blue fish this time. Any guesses on what his name is going to be? :)

So today we say farewell to our first pet, our first fish. May you find endless amounts of water to swim in, Red Fish.


***Oh and for those that are wondering, I am still pregnant. Today is my due date and if I don't have the baby this weekend, they will induce me on Monday.

So not funny

So there I was today halfway through my errands driving along minding my own business. Boogers was in the back seat babbling about who knows what, asking me all kinds of "why" questions that don't have answers. She really knows how to step on my last nerve with the "why" questions-especially the ones that don't have answers. "What is this song called, Mom?" "Time Bomb," I answer. "Why?" She inquires. I just shake my head.

Anyway, I digress. So there we are driving along and I look in the rear view mirror and see a cop behind me. He didn't have his lights on and I wasn't speeding or doing anything wrong so I didn't have anything to worry about, so I thought. The light in front of me turned yellow, then red so I stopped slowly. As soon as the light turned green I watched the cop and sure enough he turns his lights on.

What the crap?! I wasn't doing anything wrong! So I pull over and tell Boogers to please keep quiet in the backseat because the police man wants to talk to me. "Why does he want to talk to you, Mom?" I just don't even answer that one.

As my heart is beating out of my chest he walks up to the window and just as cheerfully as if we were having a donut together he says, "How you doing today? I just pulled you over because I wanted you to know that one of your rear brake lights was out." Relieved I said, "Oh I was wondering what I did wrong!" He was very kind and told me he was sorry for freaking me out, but had I ever been arrested?

Nope.

"Okay can I see your driver's license?" I give it to him and he takes it back to his car to make sure it's valid. No problem.

When he comes back he apologized again for worrying me and to have a nice day. He didn't even give me a fix-it ticket or anything. Just sent me on my way.

So the center brake light on our car has been out for years. I don't think it's been working since we even owned the car which we bought from my dad 4 years ago. He must not have had anything to do today and decided to freak out an almost 9 month pregnant mom just for the fun of it. So not funny.

Where to sleep?

How about a box?

Sleep tight, Boogers. Sleep tight.
(For the record it was her idea)

10 Things I like that start with "D"

I needed some help getting out of my blogging slump so when I saw this on bythelbs blog, I jumped at the chance. It's a game where you are assigned a letter and then you have to list 10 things you like that start with that letter. I got the letter "D" due to the impending delivery of my second child.

So without further adieu here are 10 things I like in no particular order that start with the letter "D"

1. Dessert-Especially this time of year. I just bought a 4 lb carton of strawberries from the store today to make strawberry shortcake for Easter. Yum! But that's not all, I love cookies, and brownies and pies. It's a good thing I have a fast metabolism....except when I'm pregnant.

2. Daisies-These are such a beautiful, joyful flower. Doesn't that just make you smile?

3. Daughters-Speaking of making me smile. Boogers, my sweet daughter makes me smile all the time. She also makes me want to do other things, but all in all she is a wonderful little girl. I'm so glad I was blessed with a daughter.

4. Deals-Who doesn't like a good deal? I love saving money and when I get a great deal on something that just makes my day!

5. Diamonds-While they are not my favorite gem, I really adore diamonds. I only have one and that is my diamond engagement ring, but it is something I treasure. I just wish it fit these days. Someday I hope to have more....

6. David Cook-My favorite American Idol winner. I also adore Chris Daughtry but technically he didn't win. I felt silly buying his album but it's really good!

7. Dreams-I don't have too many dreams lately since I'm so wasted when I get to bed, but there are some that I've had over my life that I remember vividly. I seem to have recurring themes in my dreams and the most prevalent one is that they all have some form of water in them. Another recurring dream I remember was when I was in High School. I constantly dreamed I was late for Math class. We had class in the temporary buildings in the back and I would run to class and be locked out. I hated that dream.

8. Dancing-I haven't done a lot of dancing lately being pregnant and all, but I really do enjoy doing it. I'm not a big fan of Dancing with the Stars or any of those dance shows, but I like doing it myself. Not that I'm any good at it, but Stake dances and Young Adult dances were usually the highlight of my week when I was younger.

9. Dollars-What do I need to say about this one? I like money. Isn't it the best thing to find a buck or two in your jeans?

10. Dads-My dad and of course T-Bone. Dads are great. I have a great Dad and I married a great dad. What would we do without them?

And she's ready for Kindergarten

So Boogers got her Kindergarten shots today. It was traumatizing for both of us. First they had to do a blood draw at the lab and the lab guy took so long to actually take the blood. If he had only just stuck her instead of talking about it for 2 minutes I think it would have been better. She always asks to go get her blood taken since she sometimes comes to the lab with me. Then it was time for the shots. She kept screaming, "I don't want any shots!" over and over. It was very heart wrenching for me. Even bribes didn't work. When I told her she had to get shots if she wanted to go to Kindergarten she said, "But I don't want to go to Kindergarten!" That was huge for her. She's been talking about going to Kindergarten for months. I really had to hold her down while she was screaming and crying--and while I was crying too. I'm not usually very emotional about these things, but today I was. I'm sure that being pregnant has something to do with it but I don't want to see her go through that again! The good news is she's feeling better now watching a movie I rented for her and rotting her teeth out with a Bottle Pop candy. As she told me when we were leaving the store, "I don't feel sad anymore." Oh to be four and have short term memory loss.

I love it when things go my way

This day is starting out great! Hopefully it continues on that way.

So a few months ago I bought some yarn from Joann's to make a blanket for my dear friend Lacey. I made it and had what looked like tons left over. So I decided to make one for Buckethead too. Well of course I ran out. I thought it would be easy to just go back to Joann's and buy another skein. Let me tell you how hard it has been to find this yarn again. The store closest to me has none but for 2 weeks has said they have some on order. Just keep calling on Monday to see if they get it in, they say. Well it's not coming in. So yesterday I called another store in the area--well like 25 miles away--and they say they have one. The girl goes to look for it and can't find it. Bummer. But she is very helpful and says she will continue to look and to call today to see if she was able to find it. If you've ever worked in retail you know that an inventory of 1 is usually not all that reliable. I was not optimistic.

But I called this morning anyway. And lo and behold....it's there! Hooray! I am so excited! The guy that was on the phone probably thought I was some crazy person--on a side note I always think it's funny to see guys working at Joann's, but anyway--because I was so happy! We are going down to that area anyway today to go to Balboa Park so it's not even out of my way!

On to thing number two: I bought a stroller last week on Overstock.com. I looked all over for strollers I liked but none of them struck my fancy. Then I saw this one. I had never tried it out or even seen it in a store, but you know how when something just feels right? I knew this was the stroller for me, despite it's color scheme. The brown and orange really don't look too bad in real life. I missed the delivery of it on Monday but it came yesterday. Of course I was all excited to put it together. But something wasn't right. The stroller frame kept coming off the brake bar. Yeah, not safe at all. So I called the manufacturer yesterday and of course they closed 3 mintues before I call. I left a message and then I went on their website. I started reading and it said if you bought it from somewhere else then you should go through them. So I went on Overstock.com and submitted a request for an exchange.

This morning Go Go Babyz called me back and I talked to another very nice guy--the stars must be aligned for me to get really helpful Customer Service agents--who helped me figure out the problem. It was defective and he's sending a new part out in two days! Yay! So then I was all worried about my exchange on Overstock, but that's all taken care of too.

I got a sweet stroller and my skein of yarn that I needed! I love it when things work out!

Anything good happen to you lately?