21 February 2006

Ahhh, life

I really should write more, but lately I just have nothing to say. My day is the same every day. I feel like I have no purpose anymore. I'm on the verge of crying right now for some reason. Don't get me wrong, I love being Rachel's mom, but I just feel like I'm doing nothing during the day. Spencer and I had quite a big fight on Saturday about Valentine's day celebrations and that didn't help either. We went on a date (only because my mom was babysitting and it was already planned) and barely talked for 4 hours. We just haven't been on the same page for a while it seems. We talked it over Sunday night but I guess I'm still feeling the effects of it. So last night after he got home from school I told him we were having FHE. A few months ago we decided we were going to try to do it with Rachel before she went to bed. Now that Spencer doesn't get home from school until Rachel's bedtime on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesdays we haven't been having it. I think that is part of the reason why we haven't been getting along the best.

Today I was supposed to go visiting teaching. I called my companion on Sunday after I made the appointments and left a message for her. Apparently she never got it because she called me at noon today when she got the message. Our appointment was at 10. So instead I left and did some errands. I returned something of Spencer's and actually bought something for myself. I have had a gift card to Ann Taylor Loft for over a year and decided to go in and see what I could find. I bought a cute shirt for $10 bucks and it actually made me feel better. I need new clothes desperately, but money is short. It's amazing what a new shirt can do for my attitude.

I'm still feeling bad that I don't have something for myself to do. For a while I was really into this blog, then I started knitting booties and hats for little babies, but nothing really sticks. I need a purpose! Well I'm off to go read the BYU-H alumni magazine and make dinner. Ahhh, life.

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