09 March 2009

Can I whine now?

Let me first say I am beyond grateful to be pregnant. I want to make that clear. After two years of trying to get pregnant and two miscarriages how could I not be? I love that there is a child growing and moving inside of me and that he is healthy and will soon join our family.

However, I hate being pregnant.

I've never been one of those women who love it and cherish every moment of pregnancy. The only two good things pregnancy does to my body is it makes my leg hairs grow really slow and it clears up my skin. For those two things I'm grateful. I mean shaving your legs is hard enough as it is when you're pregnant, right? I hardly have to shave my legs once a week. And I love having clear skin. But pregnancy is purely a means to an end for me. I'm 29 weeks and feeling completely done, but then I get depressed because I realize I have 11 weeks to go and I know its only going to get worse. I feel huge already. Imagine how I'm going to feel in a month or two.

I feel like I have a bowling ball between my legs every time I stand up. It is so hard to roll over in bed because of that bowling ball putting pressure on my pelvis. I can't stand up for too long or my feet start to hurt because they aren't used to carrying so much weight on them. I can't sit down for too long because my back or legs start to hurt. When I lay down, I can't breathe because my uterus is in my lungs.

But then I sit down to write this post and there goes little Buckethead flailing around and kicking inside me and I feel so much love. I feel so grateful to be given the opportunity to carry this child, to be a mother again. The love I feel for him is overwhelming at times. I have found myself being late doing things because he is active and I just want to sit and feel him move. That is what it's all about. I wanted him, I love him and that makes it all worth it.

16 comments:

cornnut32 said...

amen. i feel your pain...and i'm only 11 weeks. babies are great, but the pregnancy sucks. i never understand when people tell me they loved being pregnant. weirdos. :)

Callie said...

HUGS sweetie! I can so understand how your feeling. I only have 4 weeks left!!!! I am going through a mix of emotions too!

(I do have to say isn't that wonderful, the slow leg hair thing? I thought it was odd but am loving it.)

Janelle said...

Of course you can whine!

Shelley~Maren said...

Jamie, can you email me your mailing address? I have something for you and the wee buckethead, and it won't attach in an email. ;) Hang in there!

Susan M said...

Those last couple months were the hardest for me---sooo uncomfortable. I think us short people suffer the most during the end stages!

Alison Wonderland said...

I think Susan's on to something there. I can't say that I loved being pregnant but I didn't mind it too much. But then there are lots of things that I do mind a lot. (Like raising the stinkin' things.)

flip flop mama said...

Susan, you are so right. There's just no room anymore. My friend is due at the end of this month and she's doing just fine--but then again she is 5' 9" so there's a lot more room there.

Staceygirl said...

Aw, that's really sweet.

knitkumpoop said...

I know what you mean about feeling like there's a bowling ball between your legs. I hated that.

Email me and tell me what you want me to knit, sew, or crochet for Buckethead. I want to make him something but since you also knit, I don't want to duplicate anything.

PS. Just think, someday Buckethead will be punching girls in the face in his 1st grade class. It's so sweet!

Summer said...

I am so with you. I love the end result but I absolutely hate being pregnant. The only good thing about it is the magical feeling of baby moving inside. When it's not painful it's magical anyway. :)

flip flop mama said...

Kristen, that will be the proudest moment of my life....not.

Jen said...

You have every right to whine. It's hard to be so uncomfortable and without sleep.

bythelbs said...

Dude, that is the prerogative of every pregnant woman. Enjoy it! The whining, I mean. Not the pregnancy. Not that you shouldn't enjoy the pregnancy. But it's OK that you're not. Oh, never mind.

I loved that line about your uterus being in your lungs. Classic. And so true!

madhousewife said...

Go ahead and whine. Whine to your heart's content. Or discontent. Whichever.

Funny that your uterus would be in your lungs. At this stage of pregnancy, I felt like my uterus was halfway through the birth canal.

Melissa said...

I loved being pregnant the first time. Second time I was done around 30 weeks. My last baby? I was tired of being pregnant around 10 weeks... so, you're more than welcome to whine away to me! I understand that it's not a fun thing sometimes... hopefully the next 11 weeks will FLY BY!

Suz Broughton said...

I came here through Susan's blog and this post caught my eye because I was exactly the same way as you both times I was pregnant. Even down to the hair on my legs, my pregnancies sound similar to yours.
Take care of yourself.
Suz