31 August 2009

And She's Off

Two hours ago I dropped my first born off at her first day of Kindergarten. I only cried a little bit.

She has always been a well-adjusted and did not disappoint today.

She was awake before 6am this morning and dressed with her shoes on by 7:30. She had her backpack and her lunch box for her snack ready. She could not wait. She has been looking forward to this day for months. Probably even since last year. I'm not sure why she has been so excited for Kindergarten, but none the less has been. It seems like she's been looking forward to it since her last birthday. She turned 4 but the next day couldn't wait to turn 5.

Last night T-Bone gave her a Father's blessing. I loved these as a child growing up. Each year we would gather in the living room so my Dad could give us a blessing before the start of the school year. I always felt so much more prepared and ready to tackle the challenges that school gave me after the blessing. I hope Boogers feels the power that the Priesthood can be in her life.

Every few minutes she would ask me if it was time to go yet. I kept telling her, "Not until 11:30." A few minutes later, "What time do we leave again, Mom?"

Finally 11:30 came, T-Bone got home just in time, and we took off up the hill to the school. She loves to walk so we walked. But oh my it was hot! We were all sweating by the time we got up there. Then we had to wait outside the gates in the blazing heat and we sweated more.

Boogers was looking a little nervous even though she didn't say she was while we were waiting. We took a couple pictures to memorialize the day and finally they opened the gates. The kids have to wait at the gate for someone to come and escort them to their teachers so T-Bone took her. It was a little chaotic--as I'm sure all first days are--but it was finally her turn. I think she was a little unsure of what was going on until she saw her teacher and then her eyes just lit up! (We met her teacher last Thursday). She immediately held up her Barbie lunch box to show her and then turned around to show off her Hello Kitty backpack. Then she waited patiently in line for the rest of the kids. When they brought them by the gate to go to their classrooms she smiled and waved and was off.

I only shed a couple tears. I'm not one to be sad when my kids grow up, I know that it has to happen. But I wonder how she will do. I wonder what kind of influence the other kids and school will have on her. I wonder if I've taught her enough to prepare her for this. I want her to succeed and be happy.

Instead of being sad that she's growing up I have done more contemplating my parenting. T-Bone and I are very strict parents. But sometimes with that strictness comes a bit of harshness too. I've been thinking about that a lot lately. I know she will be bombarded with so much at school and I really want her home to be a place of refuge. I want her parents to be people she can come to without judgment or fear. More than anything I want her to be able to feel the Spirit in our home and know that it is a different place than school.

I'm glad Boogers is starting Kindergarten. It has made me resolve to be a better parent and a better person. I just hope I can be one.


Julie said...

It's kind of an incredible thing, isn't it?

Congrats to Boogers.

Shellybythesea said...

She will have many influences in her life, but most likely she will be the one doing the influencing. A strong, confident, well loved little girl. She has always known who she is and what she wants for herself. She will share with others and be a wonderful influence and example to many!

Cynthia said...

She looks absolutely adorable! I'm glad she took to it like a duck to water.

I'm not one to cry much over these things either- usually. When the twins went of to Kindergarten I was so RELIEVED because having 3 kids in 3 years is really intense. However, sending my youngest off to 1st grade this past week was pretty hard.

The mere fact that you are thinking so deeply about ways you can stretch yourself and grow as a person for their sakes pretty much tells me that you'll be exactly what they need you to be. Enjoy the quiet-er time while she's gone.

Melissa said...

I hear ya! I'm not so sad about the growing up part... just wondering if the changes that will happen will be for better or worse. It scares me to think about it...

Jen said...

She looks so adorable.

Anonymous said...

Yes you can!

Boogers is so adorable.

Next year my last will be in kindergarten. That's going to be...weird.

Jessica said...

She looks so cute! How did she do? I still can't believe she is in Kindergarten!

Steph said...

She looks so cute on her first day of school! I sent Will off on the bus for his. AHHH! He loved it.

shay said...

I love your thoughts on strict parenting vs having a refuge...I really need to remember that! I think I sometimes drive my kids away by expecting so much of them at home. Rachel looks so cute her first day! Did she get am or pm?