25 May 2011

Happy Birthday Mr. Smiley!

My little man is 2!! Happy Birthday little guy!  We love having him in our family, he's such a ray of sunshine. Just a few things about him:

*He has an infectious giggle and even though I can never get a picture of him smiling he is a very happy kid.
*Every time he says the word "truck" it comes out "f--ka". It's awesome. I cringe every time. I don't know if I'll ever get used to heaing my little 2 year old swear. Why, oh why are there so many trucks around?
*He says, "Dada work, Big Sister school, Mama home" every day just so he knows where everyone is.
*He loves to watch Thomas the Tank Engine, Phineas and Ferb and Sesame Street.
*One of his favorite things in the world is balloons. The living room was filled with them this morning when he woke up. Incidentally he woke up crying this morning at 6 (I think he may have rolled out of his bed) and when I went to get him and put him in our bed the first thing he noticed was the "bayoons!!!"
*One of his other favorite thing is motorcycles. Anytime he sees one--or hears one--he yells, "Ycle!" 
*He loves strawberries, pizza, cereal, juice, pickles, waffles and bread. But he'll eat a lot of things. He definitely has gotten a little more picky lately but still likes a variety of foods.
*He loves his "bleh-bleh" (green blanket)
*For the last month he's been sitting on the potty a few times a day. I wasn't sure he was really ready to potty train, but I think I'm going to bite the bullet and go get him some undies and see how it goes. Almost every time I change his diaper he tells me, "peepee potty!" so he definitely knows what it means!
*He's our "yes" man. Pretty much everything you ask him he'll say in a very voice, "YES!"

We love you Mr. Smiley! Happy Birthday!

19 May 2011

3 and 3

I've been extra emotional lately, under a bit of stress. Consequently it has contributed to my yelling and and ability to cry at the drop of a hat. This week has been the worst. It's been a roller coaster of emotions as I try to sort through things and get certain things sorted out. On Monday Big Sister was talking back for the 100th time that morning--did I mention it was only 8 o'clock?--and I just lost it. I yelled at her and I yelled at her good. Then because of it I cried my eyes out. You know the ugly sobbing, convulsing cry. I felt terrible. I had woken up stressed and took it out on my sweet daughter.  I hadn't cried like that in probably 5 or 6 months. Through the sobs I prayed. That was all I could think of to do. I prayed for forgiveness, prayed for comfort and most of all prayed for the ability to control myself. I composed myself and continued on with the day and got Big Sister off to school. The day did get better though. A dear friend saw my pathetic post on Facebook and offered to bring us dinner. It was such a blessing and I am beyond grateful to her. Tuesday and Wednesday were better (although I did cry again yesterday trying to talk to an insurance company).  Today has been great so far though. I got to go to the doctor and I got to see something beautiful.

Two weeks and one day ago I found out I am pregnant for the 6th time.  Today we saw a tiny, beautiful beating heart.

I wasn't sure I wanted to have another child. I was completely content with our two a few months ago. The thought of being pregnant again and possibly going through another miscarriage was not something I wanted to think about. T-Bone was completely supportive too, and he was the one that thought we should have three. He didn't want me to have to go through another miscarriage either. Then I had an experience where I knew that there was one more for us. I never thought I'd have one of those. I've heard people say they felt like someone was missing from their family or had a dream or even that there was a spirit watching them and they'd get a glimpse of them. Honestly I always thought those stories were kind of weird. Not that I didn't believe them, but....I didn't quite believe in them. But now I know that those things can happen. I was stubborn and I guess I needed a little push to understand.

I had a panic attack when I found out. I knew in my heart, yet I didn't really want to know so I waited a couple days before taking the test. I guess I didn't want to have to face the reality and the stress that comes with me being pregnant. It has been a really long two weeks. Lest you all think that I'm dreading this, I am happy. I look forward to the day when I can bring another child into our family but the what-ifs of the present sometimes get in the way of my joy in the future.

I know that it isn't usually conventional to spread the news of a pregnancy so early--I'm only 6 weeks--but my pregnancies haven't really been conventional either. Besides if I lose it I'm going to post about it anyway, cuz I just can't just keep my mouth shut. Plus talking about it is therapeutic. I've been doing everything I can to try to keep this pregnancy--taking progesterone and baby aspirin, and taking it as easy as I can--and especially praying. Heavenly Father has heard from me a LOT. I realize that I may not know everything and that there is a plan for me and things don't always work out the way I want them to--I would be an idiot if I didn't acknowledge that--but I do know that prayers can't hurt and there is a big chance they actually can help. And so I ask if you will say a prayer or two or however many you want for me.

This is our last try. If we can end the record at 3 and 3 we'll be thrilled.

01 May 2011

This is what happens....

....when Big Sister leaves her markers--all 50 of them--so Mr. Smiley can play with them when he wakes up from his nap.

At least he didn't have any clothes on to ruin. This is the first time we've had to experience this, but based on this kid's track record, I'm sure it won't be the last!

And The Winner Is.....

Look for an email from me. Thanks so much everyone for entering and playing along! Happy Sunday!